23 grumpy animals who HATE you.

1. ‘You are not even beneath my contempt.’

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2. ‘There’s only one problem with your face, I can see it.’

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3. ‘The 1980’s called. They want their fashion back.’

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4. ‘I love what you’ve done with your hair. How do you get it to come out of the nostrils like that?’

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5. ‘It looks like your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a hammer.’

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6. ‘You have the right to remain silent because whatever you say will probably be stupid anyway.’

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7. ‘You look like a before picture.’

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8. ‘I’m not being rude, you’re just insignificant.’

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9. ‘Shock me, say something intelligent.’

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10. ‘I don’t care how funny you are, if I don’t like you, I won’t laugh.’

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11. ‘If I got a penny for everyone I’ve met who is as beautiful as you, I’d have all the money in the world.’

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12. ‘Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you’re an asshole.’

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13. ‘I don’t think you are stupid. You just have a bad luck when thinking.’

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14. ‘I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.’

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15. ‘If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.’

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16. ‘It’s not often that one gets the opportunity to speak about someone intelligent, respected and admired. Unfortunately tonight I have to talk about you.’

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17. ‘Don’t you love nature, despite what it did to you?’

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18. ‘If you’re going to be two faced at least make one of them pretty.’

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19. ‘Are you always this stupid or is today a special occasion?’

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20. ‘Please, keep talking. I always yawn when I am interested.’

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21. ‘You would never be able to live down to your reputation, but I see you’re doing your best.’

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22. ‘Everyone who has ever loved you was wrong’

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23. ‘I don’t want you to turn the other cheek. It’s just as ugly.’

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But don’t worry… he loves you… and so do we!
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